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LEO CLOSED
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rowena



Joined: 13 Aug 2003
Posts: 168
Location: Mars satellite

PostPosted: Mon Nov 12, 2007 4:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Maybe this is why Rowena and NP have been sailing in those new burkha wetsuits... I hear they're quite chic! Bull


I just hate it when my Burk-HA! gets all tangled around my legs, especially when I attempt my outside jibe. I tried wearing one of Mitchell's goofy hats to keep my veil in place, but it's just not working.

Maybe I should get some of Gregor's "wiped cream" and see if that helps glue it down, but I don't think I want to know what's in it.
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jp5



Joined: 19 May 1998
Posts: 3394
Location: OnUr6

PostPosted: Mon Nov 12, 2007 4:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

And to think those guys in the picture are protesting Bush. Maybe it's because they never get to see any??
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rowena



Joined: 13 Aug 2003
Posts: 168
Location: Mars satellite

PostPosted: Mon Nov 12, 2007 4:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Okay, JP, I think I’m on to something…

You know how Gregor says the Islamic radicals are attacking the wind sensors? Maybe that’s why the amount of sand fluctuates so much at Leo.

Like, notice how at the beginning of the season all the rocks are covered by sand, and then after a few weeks, all the sand is gone and our feet are torn to shreds walking over the rocks? Maybe the Islamic radicals are stealing our sand. Either because it reminds them of “home”, or maybe it’s their own way of torturing us!


Shocked
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jp5



Joined: 19 May 1998
Posts: 3394
Location: OnUr6

PostPosted: Mon Nov 12, 2007 6:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You're right Rowena. It is an Al-Kiter plot to make us cut our feet and break our fins.
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gregorvass



Joined: 21 Nov 1996
Posts: 1113
Location: Behind You

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2007 12:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

A group of Muslim extremists has started a fire-bomb campaign against windsurfers at Leo.

According to Associated Press, a group called the Swords of Islamic Righteousness has been threatening owners of dagger-boards for a while. They claim that such boards ere keeping Muslims away from prayer and providing pornography.

The young of Leo should only be interested in “jihad and worship” the group says. To focus Leo's youth, the Swords of Islamic Righteousness thinks the best thing is to fire-bomb the wind talkers. Ironically the group sends its messages on dagger boards and uses kite strings to circulate its statements.
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jp5



Joined: 19 May 1998
Posts: 3394
Location: OnUr6

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2007 11:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

....A female windsurfer with an assault rifle was seen repelling the attack until she ran out of ammunition. She then used a borrowed 3 foot weed fin to hack the terrorists to pieces. When asked about her heroic measures she calmly replied "one of those [beep] terrorists shoulder hopped me on that last wave". Razz
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nealpar



Joined: 25 Oct 1998
Posts: 624

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2007 2:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Other shoulder hopping terrorists will suffer harshly, as heat seeking missiles, containing condensed wiped cream, have been planted on the hillside facing Leo, and at the push of a button, the female windsurfer will have the ability to activate the missile to "pick them off" with precision. Twisted Evil

Additionally, the seaweed around Leo has now been impregnated with sensors attached to IED's containing .....you guessed it, really old condensed wiped cream , which may or may not explode whenever Mitch calls Bard. Shocked
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rowena



Joined: 13 Aug 2003
Posts: 168
Location: Mars satellite

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2007 4:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dudes. I can’t believe we been totally ignorant of this attack by Swords of Islamic Righteousness. I guess we should all be pretty grateful we’ve been able to sail “under the radar” until now. I’d like to further investigate why Leo Windsurfers might be the “Swords” target, in addition to Gregor’s “Dagger-board” theory…

Our sailboards are phallic in shape, which most certainly irritates those who subscribe to a radical interpretation of Islamic Fundamentalism. Our tack from North to South points our phalli to Mecca, considered a big “F-U” perhaps?

Mast base into board: male to female, suggesting “mating”, a definite NO-NO according to Jihadist Law.

We all utilize “Booms”. Perhaps BOOM is categorized as slang for an incendiary device.

Me, Kathy and Nealpar are women doing a “man’s” sport. And in our skin-tight wetsuits, we’re a constant temptation for men to turn toward lust instead of God. Especially Nealpar’s exemplary wave-sailing abilities. That right there could be grounds…

I’m thinking of using some of Gregor’s “wiped cream” to attach a homing beacon to the top of my board, just in case the seaweed-with-sensors grabs my board and pulls me under.

I’d like to hear TheQ’s ideas on this. That Nunzilla figure he carries shows he’s harboring some pretty weird religious thoughts. I thought I saw him rip off the footpads from his board and use Gregor’s “wiped cream” to attach a prayer rug instead.

Hey, JP, nice to see you’ve turned the “political rant” to where it belongs…shrinkage.

Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked
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cbknap



Joined: 03 Jun 1997
Posts: 371

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2007 4:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

sure those aren't IUDs with wiped cream?
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nealpar



Joined: 25 Oct 1998
Posts: 624

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2007 4:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

cbknap wrote:
sure those aren't IUDs with wiped cream?


Laughing Laughing Laughing

Yeah, those too. But they are saved for the more "personal" attacks, and when released, they will produce a "shock and awe" effect neverheretoforeseen.
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