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SAVE YOUR TIME: The Lego Movie is for small children only
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isobars



Joined: 12 Dec 1999
Posts: 14624

PostPosted: Fri Feb 14, 2014 7:12 pm    Post subject: SAVE YOUR TIME: The Lego Movie is for small children only Reply with quote

The movie review blogs all require logins, so no go. But in the interest of saving all of you some time, money, and frustration, here's a tip: Despite almost unanimous great reviews for viewers of all ages,
THE LEGO MOVIE DOESN'T EVEN ATTEMPT TO BE FUNNY.
Darn right I'm shouting. We enjoy well over 50 movies a year, of all kinds including many animated flicks. This is the first movie we've walked out of, bored out of our minds, by midpoint, in over 30 years. The only two attempts at humor for anyone over 6 years old in that first 40 minutes or so elicited only a slight curl of one lip. I just let my wife snore, literally, until I could take no more of Legos transforming brainlessly in a flash, woke her up, and left.

Why bother posting this? Because hundreds of reviewers said it was crammed full of humor for adults and very meaningful. They all lied or were high on nitrous oxide. One reviewer said the jokes flew so furiously that adults may want to see it twice to catch them all. In reality, not ONE person in the theater laughed even ONCE during those 40-some minutes. We were praying someone in the theater would take a cell phone call so we'd have something to interest us. A bawling baby would have been funnier.

If the last half of the movie became hilarious and emotionally overwhelming,
I.
Don't.
Care.
It could NOT make up for the first half. This was the most stunningly overly-hyped movie we have seen in our lives. "Schindler's List" was funnier, and "Jackass II" had more depth.
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stevenbard



Joined: 11 Nov 1993
Posts: 4344

PostPosted: Fri Feb 14, 2014 9:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

THE AVERAGE ADULT HAS THE MIND OF A 12 YEAR OLD!!!!
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youwindsurf



Joined: 18 Aug 2012
Posts: 733
Location: Classified

PostPosted: Fri Feb 14, 2014 11:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote



I DON'T CARE! I'LL GET MY MOVIE REVIEWS FROM ROTTEN TOMATOES!
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isobars



Joined: 12 Dec 1999
Posts: 14624

PostPosted: Fri Feb 14, 2014 11:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

stevenbard wrote:
THE AVERAGE ADULT HAS THE MIND OF A 12 YEAR OLD!!!!

I'm talking 5-yos. I suspect many 6-yos would rapidly tire of this empty cartoon.
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stevenbard



Joined: 11 Nov 1993
Posts: 4344

PostPosted: Sun Feb 16, 2014 1:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I went to the movie tonight. It was excellent. Was with my teenage son, and an MD friend. We all loved it.

Don't you get it? About being creative. Standing up to the New World Order. Not conforming. And being very funny. I loved it.

Take a chill pill.
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pueno



Joined: 03 Mar 2007
Posts: 2766

PostPosted: Sun Feb 16, 2014 6:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mr. Fick-shun wrote:

I'm talking 5-yos. I suspect many 6-yos would rapidly tire of this empty cartoon.


But, somehow, you've managed to stay active in this empty cartoon for 5-year-olds, Mikey.

.
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reinerehlers



Joined: 25 Jul 2001
Posts: 1106

PostPosted: Sun Feb 16, 2014 7:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I walked out of "Wolf of Wall Street". I absolutely hated it! Got my money back, hated it.
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isobars



Joined: 12 Dec 1999
Posts: 14624

PostPosted: Sun Feb 16, 2014 6:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

stevenbard wrote:
I went to the movie tonight. It was excellent. Was with my teenage son, and an MD friend. We all loved it.

Don't you get it? About being creative. Standing up to the New World Order. Not conforming. And being very funny. I loved it.

You obviously stuck around longer than I did; I left when Batman flew off into the setting sun. I figured there MUST be a payoff ahead for sitting there bored outta my gourd for the first ~40 minutes, but wasn't willing to risk sitting through any more with no guaranteed payoff; I've been burned too often doing that. I'm glad the last half got interesting for those willing to wait; it would explain the movie's good reviews.

I skipped Wall Street (and August: Osage County) based on their reviews. Can't watch 'em all.
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DanWeiss



Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Posts: 1979
Location: Connecticut, USA

PostPosted: Mon Feb 17, 2014 11:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

This thread ranks as the most iconic of all time. <--- That period is huge and bold.
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boggsman1



Joined: 24 Jun 2002
Posts: 3753
Location: at a computer

PostPosted: Tue Feb 18, 2014 9:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm still stuck on ISO , and MRS. ISO getting in the old Van, driving down to the Tri-Cities 16 plex, and buying two senior tickets to the freakin LEGO movie....I just cant grasp it.
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